I won't fail you (I'm not afraid)
by JediKnightErrant
Summary: AU - After the attack on the Alliance Base on Hoth, Luke Skywalker heads to Dagobah to find Jedi Master Yoda in hopes of completing his training. This Luke is a bit wiser, a bit kinder, and has already had several years of training under his belt. [seeking beta]
1. Journey

In which our Hero travels to seek out Master Yoda, and Artoo is nervous.

* * *

If there was one thing Luke Skywalker had needed to learn the hard way, it was patience. It had never come naturally to him, and his master had told him that his father had been the same way. It would take nearly a day to get from Hoth to Dagobah, which was quite a lot when you're in a very small cockpit with only a few emergency supplies available to you. Most of the supplies were packed into the ejector seat, only accessible once standing outside the ship or of course after ejecting in an emergency.

He'd completely meant to speak to high command in person, to ask for leave to go and find this Jedi Master Yoda that Master Obi-Wan had told him to find. He hadn't intended to take an X-Wing, they needed every fighter especially now, and he had worried they'd force him to resign his commission at least temporarily. The attack and sudden evacuation had nixed those plans and made a mess of everything.

A pang shot through him, it was so blase to say a mess had been made of things when he'd lost friends in that fight. He'd lost a lot of friends the last three years, sometimes not long after he'd made them. Some people got cold after a while, stopped being outgoing and trying to make new friends because it hurt too much to lose them. He wondered if that was why Obi-Wan said that the old Jedi eschewed attachments. It did hurt, losing people he cared about, but the thought of having never cared about them in the first place seemed a much worse thing. Obi-Wan said that he'd learned that as well, over the years.

It was easy to be aloof and unattached in a diplomatic situation when you'd not see any of the people involved again. You needed that detachment to be fair, since even being too friendly to someone could be seen as favoritism and damage a sensitive negotiation. But in a war, when you constantly have to rely on those around you, and have them rely on you in turn, sometimes those attachments are the only thing that kept you going.

Now his fingers tapped in the message on the comm, a bit less concerned that he might have been. No one really expected to see him anytime soon, no one would even be meeting at the rendezvous point for at least three months. No one wanted to take a straight route anywhere when someone might be tracked. Still, it felt as though he were abandoning the other Rogues, and he took his responsibilities seriously. He took a lot of things seriously these days.

Artoo warbled at him from just behind and above him, pale blue letters scrolling across the HUD, / _/You've spoken of taking time before, with Mon Mothma, master Luke. To draw some of the bounty hunters and others seeking you away from the fleet._ /

"Yeah, I know Artoo, but I was going to get Han to drop me someplace where I could get my own little ship with just me and you and not take any resources from the Alliance. Chewie said he might know someone who could help me, at least sort of. He knew Jedi in the Clone Wars."

/ _A Jedi Master might help you more._ / Artoo's reply was simple, but if a droid could project anxiety the little astromech was doing so now.

Luke knew Artoo hadn't been memory wiped in decades, something he'd only revealed to his new master once he'd argued with a tech that he liked Artoo the way he was and to leave the droid alone. He had backups going back before the Clone Wars even, and hidden programs to make any casual technical checkup show the normal memory wipes and maintenance that most astromechs were subjected to on the regular. It explained a lot of things, particularly Artoo's robust personality and sense of humor.

"What do you mean?" Luke asked, settling down in his seat more comfortably and watching the blue lines and whorls of hyperspace go by, "Might help?"

/ _Most human Jedi began the training before the age of four standard, and other sentients at that equivalent for their species. This Jedi Master you seek, might find it much more worrying to take on a half trained student at the age of twenty-two._ /

Luke ran a hand over his face, "I'll just have to do my best to convince him I suppose." His fingers traced the lines of the fresh scars on his face. He wasn't particularly worried about his looks, since no one else seemed to care, but it would take some getting used to. Shaving was going to be interesting for a while, that was for certain.

He let out a breath and took in another, beginning the familiar breathing pattern of the simplest meditation he'd been taught, / _I'll do what I can to help._ /

Luke grinned even as he let himself drift in the embrace of the Force.


	2. Arrival

In which our Hero 'lands' on Dagobah and Artoo doesn't like it.

* * *

"Yeah, that's Dagobah," Luke said, going over the readout from the scanners. Something about the planet made him uneasy, but there was also a bit of interest there too. Obi-Wan had always told him to trust his feelings, and when he'd let himself do so they hadn't failed him. Conflicted, that was the right word for how he felt about the planet. On one hand, he had the word of his Master that there was a Jedi there who could teach him everything he didn't know about the Force. On the other hand, there was something down there that made him want to turn right back around.

"There's something down there," he said, softly.

Artoo trilled worriedly, / _/Do you think it's safe for us to go down there, Master Luke?_ /

"I think we'll be fine, we'll definitely be careful. I don't see any signs of a settlement or anything though."

/ _A planet with no settlements, with a great many life signs, no obvious place to land, and one Jedi Master to find. Master, are you certain this is a good idea? We could head toward the rendevoux point, or visit your Aunt and Uncle, or any number of other things that would be more productive than wandering around world that seems to be ninety-point-zero-one-seven mud._ /

Luke laughed, "You just made the number up, and it won't be as bad as all that," he said, then for fairness sake added, "probably. You trust me, I'll trust the Force, and we'll get it all worked out in no time buddy."

/ _I've heard this many times before, Master Luke. Jedi seem quite fond of this method of working things out, and it usually ends up with scratches and dings and grit in my motivator._ /

"Don't be such a pessimist, if all else fails I'll levitate you everywhere. How's that?"

A disgusted blatting sound accompanied the little droids reply, / _Fix my rocket jets and you won't have to._ /

Luke sighed, he'd attempted the repair more than once and hadn't quite managed it. If he'd been able to hit up the right junkyards he might have been able to do it by now. The truth was that Artoo was old for an astromech, although most of the R2 units in use in the Alliance weren't particularly top of the line new models either. It also didn't help that they'd been modified by a technical genius and made powerful out of all proportion to the size of the little droid. Most R2s that had the boosters installed could make short flights, for ejection purposes mainly or to assist in getting into the ports when the gear was damaged or there was no time to engage it. Artoo insisted that he could fly quite long distances as well as much higher than any others.

"Sorry buddy," he said, angling the ship into the atmosphere, "Han's got a lead on the parts I need, when we get back maybe he'll have picked them up on the way."

Very abruptly Luke had no more concentration for anything but trying to keep control of his descent. The sensors were going crazy, insisting first that crashing into the ground was imminent and then that there was nothing beneath them but open sky. A thick miasma of cloud blocked out any hope of getting visual confirmation of any of the paradoxical readouts.

He got the distinct impression, from Artoo's frantic vocalizations, that the little droid would be shouting 'I told you so' at him.

"It's ok," he said, trying to reassure himself as much as his companion, "I just have to-" He cut off, gritting his teeth as one foil clipped something that crunched. He hoped it was a branch or something, not actually a piece of his X-Wing making that sound.

He could feel panic welling up in him at the thought that he'd made a mistake and they'd crash here. They could be hurt, the ship could be irreparably damaged, their comm could go out. Even if the comm didn't go out, what if whatever electromagnetic disturbance that had fouled up the sensors made it impossible to get a call for help out to his friends? There were so many awful possibilities that he began to feel overwhelmed.

Stop, and think. he told himself, No , a quieter voice murmured, one he'd always trusted, stop thinking.

He shut out the sound of the screaming alarms, acknowledged his fear and that the possibilities were only 'maybes' and not 'inevitabilities'. He released his fear, let it slide away as he'd been taught. He embraced hope, calm, confidence. He would land the ship, they would be safe, and he would make his next decisions after that. 

* * *

Sitting on the nose of his X-Wing, Luke surveyed the area around them. They'd set down in a very small clearing, and his heart had leapt into his chest to realize that if he'd let his nerves get the better of him they'd have likely crashed. Oh, he didn't think it would have been as bad a nightmare as his imagination had spun since there had been so many trees and so much ground cover that they'd have slowed enough with even a controlled fall to avoid completely crashing. It would have been a hell of a thing though, hanging half in and out of a tree or nose first into the water or a pit full of mud.

Artoo wailed, a frustrated sound echoing in the fog shrouded darkness. Obi-Wan had sworn his father could understand droid language, and some of the spacers around Anchorhead and Mos Espa seemed to get the gist of things a lot of the time. For a while, as a kid, Uncle Owen had just thought he was making things up when he talked back to the droids he'd worked on. Kids did that, they had big imaginations and tended to anthropomorphize things. As he got older though, Luke had managed to convince him that he really could. It had made Owen uneasy, and even Beru who was usually more patient and understanding with her nephew's quirks had told him that he shouldn't tell his peers. He'd made the mistake once, in front of Fixer. He hadn't done that again, after the relentless teasing about how he had so few friends out in the middle of nowhere that he had to talk to machines.

"I think it's night," he answered, "I hope so anyway, but if it is this dark during the day I'm sure we can manage something."

The running lights as well as two spotlights shone out into the darkness, reflecting back on shifting banks of mist. Occasionally, points of glittering red or green eyes were caught in the beams of light as well. No creatures seemed particularly interested in coming closer, except the insects that swarmed around the lights and added to the eerie atmosphere by making the light dance and flicker.

In the hope that they were just in Dagobah's night cycle, Luke pulled out the thin blanket-like sheet of solar netting and made tent out of it over the cockpit. He had more than enough power and fuel for the X-Wing to get to the rendezvous or even farther if he needed to, but if he planned to be here for the next month or so trying to find this Jedi Master he'd rather be safe and keep the spare generator loaded to power Artoo and any gear he might need. He didn't have much, really, that needed charging, but he wanted to be prepared.

/ _Master Luke, please tell me we aren't leaving the ship until we know for certain that it isn't going to get brighter? I don't want to complain, but I don't want to disappear into a hole in the ground or sink into mud or be eaten by something with a taste for metal._ /

"I'm not in that much of a hurry," he said, "and I completely agree that it would be a bad idea to take off into the dark right now. I'm beat, I've been going for more than a day and a half and that's right out of the med-center. The medics can't complain about me running off to fight, but they'd have some words for me if I got chewed up by some other animal when I could have been smart and gotten some rest first."

* * *

A small figure watched from the branches of a tree, just outside the range of the powerful lights of the small craft. Jedi Master Yoda watched as the young man settled himself back into the cockpit with a slight groan, then a soft laugh that bounced off the fog banks and dissipated into the night as he continued to speak amiably to his droid.

"Despite what I've told you, you were still expecting something different." Obi-Wan's voice was quiet, although he didn't need to keep his tone to a whisper. Luke wouldn't hear them from this distance, even if he could reliably hear his old teacher in any case.

"Too old, he would have been," Yoda admitted, "If train him before, you had not." The old being's voice was rough, from disuse as much as the long years of weariness and grief. The very air here weighed him down, after so many years secluded near a place steeped in darkness. His ears raised as another soft laugh and a "Good night, to you too," reached them.

"Sometimes I wonder if I should have taken him myself, raised him…" Obi-Wan trailed off, contemplating what could have been, "but I think I did the right thing. He has a firm grounding in the galaxy, he knows how to relate to people in a way that it took me until I was years older to be capable of."

Yoda sighed, it wasn't a particularly new argument. They'd been having it since before Anakin had been knighted. If the Jedi hadn't been so isolationist, if they hadn't been so obsessed with maintaining complete objectivity and eschewing attachments so severely, perhaps many things would have been different. Just what would be different was a matter of debate, and it had been debated for centuries as the Jedi order had evolved and centralized after the Ruusan Reformation.

"See we will, what we can make of him," Yoda conceded. It was more than enough time to seek his own warm bed, and see how the boy reacted to his surroundings in the morning.


	3. New Friends

Our hero makes a new friend and Artoo is annoyed.

* * *

It was the sound of something rustling too close to Luke's head that woke him, but he didn't make any sudden movements. He paused, listening as something, or someone, rifled through the bags he'd perched on one of the wings of the fighter. A soft voice was humming, muttering something that sounded like nonsense in what might have been Basic.

He was relieved to see that he had arrived on Dagobah during the night, and it looked as though the sun was just beginning to filter through the mist and trees. It was almost a magical sight, he never got tired of seeing new places, particularly green ones.

Artoo was still powered down, and he could hear a very faint whir from the astro-droid slot behind him as his friend's sensors reacted to the movement nearby. He cracked an eye open and twitched his head to the side to get a look at the creature squatting just a few feet away. It pulled out a glow lamp, turned it over and flicked the switch to turn it on. It knew exactly what it was and how to use it, Luke mused, so it must be familiar with modern tech. His scanners hadn't picked up any settlements, but for all he knew this being and its people had come here to escape the Empire, or were just from an ascetic religious group that shunned most technology. Just because he hadn't picked up the usual amount of comm equipment, vehicles, or the sort of computers and traffic that would be associated with something like a spaceport it didn't mean there weren't ships here that were simply powered down and in storage to hide them.

The little being was green, likely all the better to blend into Dagobah's landscape if this was it's homeworld, and had little wisps of white hair floated around it's wrinkled head and face. It's rough brown robes looked as though they'd been used for quite a long time, worn and ragged at the hems and sleeve cuffs but well cared for for all of that. He could see lines of stitches in thread that wasn't quite the same color, and places that might have once been stains that had been scrubbed as clean as possible.

It's tri-dactyl hands were quick and nimble as it pulled things out of the bag and examined them, then tucked them back in and pulled out another. It came up with a ration bar and the crackling of the wrapper as he tore it open gave Luke a good excuse to 'wake up' and say something.

"Are you hungry?" Luke asked, voice quiet so as not to startle it. With the beads of dew covering the thin plastine canopy he'd draped over the cockpit, he was certain the surface of the X-Wing must be slick.

The thing squeaked and jumped, but it's clawed feet scraped on the hull and it kept it's balance by waving it's arms about. It peered at him, it's wrinkled face more curious than afraid, then it smiled at him and he smiled back.

"It's alright," he said, keeping his voice gentle. He wasn't certain if the being spoke Basic, but a calm tone was easy to understand. Luke motioned toward the ration bar still clutched in its fist, "You can have it, if you want."

It sat down abruptly, pulling open the package and gnawing on one corner of it. They weren't bad, as such things went, but not something anyone would likely eat for pleasure unless they had wretched taste already. The being, Luke was beginning to think of it as male, immediately spat out the mouthful of tasteless food with a disgusted face.

"How did you grow so large, eating food of this kind?" The being, Luke was certain now that it was a 'he', grumbled. Luke hid a smile as he levered himself out of the cockpit, forcing down a groan as his aches and bruises protested. The damp did little to alleviate the pain that still lingered from his attack by the Wampa, and he knew the only thing for it would be to move more and not less no matter how much it hurt.

"Well," he said, "It isn't what I usually eat, and I think even I would shrink if I had to survive on that all the time." Luke was grateful that the being spoke Basic, it would make it easier to find out about this place. If the Force had guided him here, perhaps it had guided this little fellow to him as well. Perhaps he knew Yoda, or could lead him to the Jedi Master.

As he thought this, the being looked up at him sharply, "Wondering I am, why are you here?" Its voice was curiously shrewd, as though it had a good idea of what the answer might be.

Luke perched on the side of the X-Wing, selecting a ration bar for himself and drawing out a pouch of purified water, then offered a second to his companion who declined, "I came here looking for someone, and,"

He was interrupted by a chuckle, "Found someone you have, it would seem, eh? Hmm?"

Luke laughed as well, "Ah, yeah," he said agreeably, "I suppose I have." He held out a hand, hesitating slightly as he worried the movement might seem threatening or somehow insulting in the being;s culture, but his broad callused palm was gripped in a small taloned hand in return.

"I'm called Luke. What's your name?" He asked, pausing to take a bite of his own bland breakfast. He was hungry enough that he didn't even care that the thing was dry as asteroid dust.

"Help you, I will," he said, without answering the question, "Find your friend, yes?"

/ _How do you know his is looking for a friend?_ / Artoo blatted, causing Luke to start and look over his shoulder at the droid. His head dome spun a half cycle and then back, his photoreceptor pointed at the little being.

"Don't be rude Artoo," Luke chided and turned back to the being, who was looking at Artoo with an odd expression. He'd have said it was melancholy, or nostalgia, almost. He looked from the being, to Artoo, and back again curiously.

Artoo made a rude noise and shifted with annoyance in his slot. He didn't know what games the diminutive Jedi Master was playing, and the look he'd given the droid made it clear he was expected to play along. He'd liked Yoda, had been relieved to know he was alive, but had to admit he'd expected something like this. If he were human, he'd have sighed in exasperation. As a compromise he gave a little bloop of dissatisfaction and resigned himself to whatever game the little Master had in mind.

"I'm not looking for a friend, well not a friend yet I guess," Luke smiled down at the creature, "I'm looking for," he trailed off suddenly. Just because his new companion was cheerful and friendly, even if Luke thought the best of any people whenever he could, didn't mean they were friends of the Jedi. Obi-Wan had warned him of that.

"Yoda?" Luke started as a green clawed hand patted him on the knee, "You seek Yoda," the gruff voice said more confidently.

"Come, come," the green being smiled back at Luke, showing tiny sharp teeth. He hopped and slid down the wing to drop onto a tree limb, showing he was still spry if obviously a bit stiff, for his age. Luke was fairly certain he was elderly, instead of the wrinkles and white hair being a natural characteristic of his species, "Yes, come with me and take you to him I will!"

Luke scrambled after him, less gracefully than he'd have liked, and skidded down the wing before more carefully lowering himself to the branch and testing his weight. He looked over his shoulder at Artoo who made, not a nervous sound as he'd have expected, but something that sounded forlorn and lonely.

Could he do this? Obviously this being knew Yoda and undoubtedly, so he hoped, knew that Yoda was a Jedi Master. He made a split second decision, reaching out his hand and half closing his eyes. The magnetic locks in the astromech slot popped free, letting him very carefully lift Artoo with the Force and bring him closer to him.

He set the little droid down on the wide branch for a moment, feeling sweat rolling down his back and sides. He grinned in spite of himself, this was ridiculous, but he didn't want to leave his friend behind. Who knew how far he needed to go, after all?

He looked toward the small being who waited, more or less patiently, a few limbs away, "Let's go Artoo, I suppose we'll go on a small adventure here together."

/ _Haven't I told you I've caught C-3P0's adventure allergies, Master Luke?_ / the little droid said, resigned to his fate.

"It will be good for us," Luke said absently, "I need the practice and I'm sure you'd rather not be stuck out in the rain that I'm sure is going to start any moment now."

/ _Just don't drop me this time, please, Master Luke?_ /

* * *

Notes:

I'm fully on the 'droid's have souls and are sentient' bandwagon, I'll fight anyone who disagrees!


	4. Tests

Hey guys, wow I have so many likes! I didn't think people would be so excited about this. Thanks for that! Sorry it took me so long to get this up, been really busy. I'm going to update Echoes of Light by the weekend if anyone is following that as well!

Chapter four

Artoo raised up on his treads and pointed his photoreceptor through the small window in the side of the Luke had apologized for having to leave him outside in the dripping rain that filtered through the mossy trees after discovering the droid couldn't fit through the door. At first glance the hut seemed to be made entirely of natural materials. However, Artoo could see bits and pieces here and there that seemed to be made of repurposed starship parts. More accurately, he deduced, parts of an

E3-standard starship lifeboat. He and Threepio had made use of one once, and had been increasingly grateful during the nearly four week trip that they were not organic. He had no idea how those things were supposed to seat four medium sized sentients, two if they weren't bipedal.

Inside, Luke was sitting against a support and staying well out of Yoda's way as the old trickster puttered around apparently making breakfast. His Master had tried to offer to help cook, which was kind but would have been a very poor way of thanking anyone for hospitality. Luke Skywalker was not a master of any species' culinary arts.

Luke watched, bemused, as the being seemed to be making much more of a production out of cooking than what was strictly necessary to prepare a meal even in relatively primitive conditions. There seemed to be some power source about, but it was in use only for vital functions. He recognized a pump to shunt water away and keep the little house from flooding, a filter to purify water, and a heating unit that warmed a small bathing area.

A red and black banded serpent slithered over his ankle and he froze for a moment, "Are we going to go to Yoda after breakfast, or do you have a way to contact him?" he asked, delicately shifting the reptile off of him with both hands. He thought of levitating toward the door, but then again for all he knew this snake was a pet. Looking around at the space, and noting that it was the only home he'd seen so far on the planet, it might be the little guy's only friend save for the Jedi.

"Is he far?" he asked, voice softening. How often did he see the Jedi? How often did he see anyone? It definitely explained him latching on to Luke, probably worried Luke would visit with Yoda and then leave him alone again.

"Not far, not far," Yoda chuckled, clattering a pan noisily. Twice he'd tripped over Luke, once striking him hard in the knee with his walking stick. Not once had the boy shown anger, not even frustration or impatience. He swore he could sense Obi-Wan gloating, which was inappropriate for a Jedi Master, and definitely not becoming an ascended being besides.

"For the Jedi it is time to eat as well," he scolded, shooing him toward the pot that smelled like it must be done by now, "Root leaf, I cook!"

He'd made the stew especially to get a reaction, but after spending time with young Skywalker he wondered if it would be anything like he'd expected. Not that it wasn't good food, it was very nutritious, edible for Humans as well as the old Master, he just hadn't bothered to add any seasoning. Or salt. And he might have overcooked it. That part might have been an accident, since he'd spent a good deal of time pretending to be busy to test the young man's patience and tripping over him on purpose to test his tolerance.

Therefore he wasn't surprised when, although he made a face when he thought Yoda couldn't see, he simply thanked him without comment and seemed ready to eat his whole portion anyway.

"There," he jabbed a clawed finger toward a small clay bowl in a niche near the pot, and accepted it as Luke handed it over. He scooped out a handful of the ground seeds and thin shavings of flavorful lurig bark, tossing half into Luke's bowl and the rest into his own, "better now." If he didn't have to eat the stew unflavored, he had no intention of doing so.

They both ate companionably for a moment, Luke's slightly pained expression lightening as the musty flavor of the vegetable based stew became much more palatable with the addition.

"Why wish you become Jedi? Hmm?" Yoda asked pointedly, looking hard at him. Artoo gave a very human razzing sound, almost too quietly to hear. Yoda ignored him, they'd have time to catch up and he'd make the droid understand.

Luke didn't look up, thinking about the question. His first thought was to shrug and say his father had been a Jedi, which had been a bit of a motivation when he was younger. But he'd grown out of that over the years, understanding that he couldn't base his decisions on what someone he'd never even met had done.

"To help people," he mused, "I want to make things more… fair," he trailed off sheepishly.

"Hmm, fair," Yoda nodded, scraping the inside of his bowl with his spoon thoughtfully, "Nothing fair, no? Hmm?"

"But shouldn't someone try? I mean, I used to get bullied a lot, that wasn't' fair. What was even less fair is that no one tried to stop it. I can't stop everyone from getting hurt, but I can do… well I can do what I *can*. Right now, the biggest bully in the galaxy is the Empire, a lot of people are being hurt, and if I can do something to help even a handful of people who are suffering then that's what I want to do."

Luke flushed, "Sorry, I do that sometimes, get excited I mean."

"Much compassion in him, like his mother," Yoda sighed, satisfied.

"My mother? How could you know my mother?" Luke asked, teasing at first, then hesitating.

"I _can_ teach him," Yoda said, wearily, "Long has it been since a Padawan _I_ have had."

"As I told you," Obi-Wan's voice echoed through the small room and Luke jumped slightly, banging his head on the ceiling. "He is ready."

"Ben? Master?" Luke looked sharply at the little being and huffed a sigh that was something like exasperation and something like amusement.

"Master Yoda?" he asked, setting his empty bowl in his lap. He could almost hear Obi-Wan laughing at him and he wanted to throw something at him, but he either didn't deign to appear now or he couldn't. He didn't know how he'd done it on Hoth, he might not be able to do it all the time.

"Hmm, yes." Yoda said, succinctly. He sat back and began to finish his meal, lips twisted in a smirk.

"Ah," Luke raised an eyebrow, "you're agreeing to train me, then?"

Yoda ate silently, ignoring the question, then thrust his empty bowl towards him, "Dishes, wash them. The path of the Jedi, long and winding it is, and begins with cleaning. Clean heart and mind, best learned by cleaning my house."

Artoo rocked back and forth, glad the charade was over. Leaning toward the window again, he blatted loudly for attention, / _And building something to keep me dry, Master Luke!_ / he demanded, / _Getting mud out of my motivator is good training too._ /


	5. Seek

In which our hero learns a new lesson and works on another, Yoda is having far too much fun, and Artoo gets left behind.

* * *

Notes:

I'm so sorry this took so long to get out. It's been crazy out here, I spend a ton of time getting things ready for a festival where I was going to have a craft table. We got there and set up, then it immediately began storming. Eventually we just couldn't hang around anymore as things were blowing off the table and our tent wasn't faring too well either.

With all of that and getting a much more physically wearing position at work I've not had the energy. I'm used to it now though so I'll be back to posting regularly.

That said, I'm thinking of writing some short stories as backstory for this work - how Luke became Obi-Wan's Padawan, a couple of Tatooine adventures, and how Luke and his Aunt and Uncle all escaped the Empire with Obi-Wan and the droids!

* * *

Chapter Five

Artoo hung suspended by invisible hands nine point seven nine one meters in the air. He was slowly orbiting a spinning crate along with a second, smaller, crate, a piece of wood, and seven and a half leaves from the tree looming over them. He gave a dissatisfied "Dwoop," as he suddenly plummeted seven centimeters.

The little droid then squealed a binary curse, wobbling sideways, making both of the Jedi laugh. This was the last of Luke's concentration and he lost control of nearly everything, showering the ground around him with debris. He managed to lower Artoo in a mostly controlled descent but was forced to dodge and roll out of the way to dodge the falling crate that had been directly over his head. The second crate landed almost on top of him, forgotten in the rush to move himself and the little droid out of the way.

"Sorry Artoo," Luke said, rolling over to sit upright, wiping wet leaves from his face and arms.

The droid deliberately ignored him, trundling past and nearly running over Luke's hand as he made for the small lean to that had been built against Yoda's hut just for him. He settled down next to the power cord jutting from a crack in the wall, running from the generator that heated water and warmed the air in the tiny bedroom over the kitchen.

/Jedi/ Artoo powered down, just to show how annoyed he was, /always doing things with their heads when they have hands. Droids are much more sensible./

Luke stretched his arms and then rolled his shoulders to work out the stiffness. His meditation was only active in the sense that he made things move, but his muscles ached as though he'd been guiding each item through the air with strength of arm alone.

"You know, Master," he said, giving a lopsided smile to Yoda, "the leaves were the hardest part. They hardly weigh anything, so you'd think it wouldn't be so bad, but that was the problem. I could barely feel them, compared to the bigger things."

He felt exhausted, but enthusiastic. Exhaustedly enthusiastic, perhaps. He'd beaten a personal record and he breathed in and out and released the slightly smug feeling of accomplishment to the Force. It was one thing to be proud of yourself, and another to be conceited.

"Sense their connection to the land around you, you must," Yoda said from his perch on a branch of the sprawling tree, "Sense their place in the Force, to the trees they fall from. A tenuous connection they still have, until broken down into the mud and water beneath them."

The Jedi Master hopped down from his branch, landing on one beneath it and then to the ground. He half hobbled over to his apprentice and teasingly poked him in the bicep with the end of his gimer stick, leaving a smudge of gray-green mud on his skin.

"A presence in the cycle of life even mud has, making up the energy fields of the Force all around us. Hm, subtle, yes, but there."

Luke put one finger on the end of the stick and guided it away from himself, "And each place feels different," he said, "I mean the dirt and ah, presence, of the place you know? Ben said it would, and he was right. Tatooine was like scratching wind and heat of the suns and the utter cold of the moonlight," he stopped, feeling embarrassed suddenly. This hadn't been something he'd had a chance to discuss with Ben before, but he continued at Yoda's encouraging nod, "I mean that's the way it is, really, but in my head too. I didn't realize how much a part of me that presence was until I got out of there."

"A desert, a dead and dry thing many believe. But even in a wasteland, thrive many forms of life do," The master's ears quirked in curiosity, "How felt you, when leaving your home behind?"

"Cold," Luke laughed a bit, "Not even desert-night cold, but cold like I'd never get warm again. I mean people say space is cold all the time, but it was so much worse than I thought it would be."

"Surrounded by millions of lives, you were, then only a few," Yoda said, "Learn you need not to sense the flow of life around you, the Living Force, comes easily to you it does. Sense the small differences in life, when all of it is seeking your attention, focus on that you will next."

"The Living Force?," Luke asked, "Ben mentioned it, once, and the Unifying Force, but isn't the Force just, you know, the Force?"

"The present, and the movement of life, the Living Force embodies," Yoda said, "The Unifying Force, the past and the future connects."

"So, living in the moment and reacting to things as they happen," Luke said, "focusing on the people and situations around me, that's what I'm good at. Versus looking back at the past and seeing how it's affecting things in the present and how it all might affect the future and planning for that?"

A warm tingling sensation alighted on his shoulder, along with the somewhat paradoxical feeling of wet earth and scorched rock that he always associated with Ben Kenobi.

"Precisely so, my young Padawan," Obi-Wan Kenobi's voice, with it's clipped and cultured Coruscanti accent, was approving. His form was less distinct in the midday light, even the pale weak glow that passed for midday here, than it had been in Hoth's twilight blue.

"It was in my opinion, and the opinion of my own Master, that our insistence upon focusing more on what has happened and what may have happened in the future," he said, "That led to our downfall."

Yoda looked at his gnarled hands, gripped tightly around the top of his gimer stick. Luke saw the old Master's ears droop with a deep sorrow. He had the impression that this was a sore spot, an old, perhaps decades old, argument that Obi-Wan had 'won'. It had been a bitter victory that left them both gazing hollow eyed for a moment out into the perpetual twilight of the forest.

"Hmm, so," Yoda hummed, "while attuned you are, most strongly, to the Living Force, ignore the promptings of the universe you should not."

"And when looking into the past and the future," Obi-Wan added, "know how the past affects the present and how the present shapes the future. Don't let yourself get too entangled in either philosophy, because that's all it is. The Force, as you said, is simply the Force. This is why I never touched on it beyond a small mention. I didn't want it to cloud your judgment, as it might have influenced ours."

It was Luke's turn to stare off into the trees, breathing in the wet and slightly dank smell of growth and decay. There was life here, more obvious than on Tatooine and and equal measure of death.

He half slipped into meditation as a silence that could have been uncomfortable settled on the clearing. It would only remain awkward if they tried to continue to hash it out, and Luke had too much to think about to ask more questions.

Like patience, clearing his mind and being still wasn't something that came naturally to him, or if anyone who'd known his father was to be believed, to Skywalkers in general. Aunt Beru had wrestled with his propensity for being easily distracted as she gave him his lessons, finally learning she'd need to give him something purely physical or mechanical to do while reading to him or quizzing him if she wanted to keep him mostly in the general vicinity.

There was a very small school in Toshe Station, much closer than Anchorhead, that met three hours a day, three days a week. Most work was done at home and assignments and testing had to be crammed into the small amount of time even very young children could be spared from the moisture farms and underground hydroponic gardens in the surrounding area.

He'd been avoiding thinking much about the future, and he'd always tried to not to dwell on the past. He wasn't necessarily afraid of the past or the future. There was nothing he could do about that past, but he always dreaded coming across someone at a new base, or someone who just hadn't met him or heard his name before. People expected things of him, especially people who assumed Anakin Skywalker had raised him or had him after the Purges in secret. They thought he should know everything about the Jedi, although he was quick to tell them he had never met his father. He never outright denied being a Jedi either, but he never openly carried his lightsaber either. No one saw him use the Force, and outside of high command who had listened as he'd turned off his computer at the battle of Yavin no one had any reason to expect him to have command of any special powers at all.

He did have a great deal of anxiety about the future, and spent time nearly every day meditating and releasing those feelings to the Force. He could only trust that he would make it through whatever fate or design threw at him. Even if he did get some glimpse of the future, which had only happened twice in his life and never over something deadly or galaxy shattering, would it come true because he did nothing, or would it come true because he'd interfered? Obi-Wan had warned him of that many times, telling stories of others who had caused more harm than help. It was a fine balance, and nearly impossible to tell.

When it came down to it, if he did See something, he'd have to make that decision when it came to it. He just had to be wary, ready for the unexpected and prepared to face it head on instead of merely worrying about what might be and what had happened in the past.

Luke wasn't certain how long he sat still and quiet, relaxed in the embrace of the Force as he worked through his thoughts and feelings. He'd explained once how meditation worked when Han had mentioned how utterly boring it looked. The former smuggler had been under the impression that clearing your mind meant thinking of nothing, blanking out all your thoughts and just existing. Some could do that, Luke had admitted, but it wasn't anything he'd ever managed nor had he ever wanted to.

Han had even tried it with him once a couple of times, but had remarked that he'd rather take on his problems with his wits and blaster than think about them for hours.

Something thumping heavily into his back made Luke yelp and throw himself forward, rolling and turning into a crouch with his hand resting over the hilt of his lightsaber.

"Ow, hey!" he admonished as he saw Artoo. The droid twittered at him in a distinctly smug fashion.

"Why'd you do that for?" he asked, relaxing his battle ready posture.

Artoo flickered his photo receptor at him, /You have to keep some attention on things around you when you're in your head Master Luke, you'll get hurt one day if you don't,/ he admonished.

Luke looked up as he heard his Master chuckle, the old Jedi stepping out of his hut and wearing fresh robes in mottled green and brown. The old Jedi usually wore them while hunting the little amphibians and fishing in the smaller pools in the swamp, using them as camouflage.

"Right, is Artoo," he said, showing sharp teeth in a wide smile as he did. That smile boded something difficult and frustrating as Luke knew from experience.

"But," Yoda said, tone not reassuring at all, "the lesson for today that is not." He grinned, wiping the slightly relieved expression for his Padawan's face.

"Much more fun will this exercise be!"

/Fun for you, you mean./ Artoo accused, making Yoda cackle.

"Bah, a Crechling game this will be. Younglings this exercise mastered," he said, poking Luke again with his stick, "Remember you when you arrived, fool you I did. Too easy, hmph. The Force in me you sensed not. An initiate lesson this should have been."

Luke cringed a bit, "No, Master, I didn't," he said, unnecessarily, "I'm not particularly good at that anyway, but all the… life, here, is distracting and you sort of faded into it. I can't do it in a crowd of people very well either, and we were working on that back home."

"Sit," Yoda commanded, tapping his stick on the crate Luke had dropped. It was cracked slightly, but still sturdy.

"You feel the connections now, yes, the life around you. A part if this, too, you are, and I as well," he murmured, Luke's eyes half closing automatically as he settled into the rhythm of Yoda's voice and followed along with the words. He was a part of the world around him, and as far as Dagobah and its inhabitants were concerned, not a particularly important one.

Luke focused on himself first, the feeling of the Force flowing in him. It moved much differently in the plants and animals around them, as they existed within it without using it or being guided by it. A sensitive person existed the same way as any other sentient, but the Force moved within them and it was always eager to gain his attention. He looked for that in himself, and then pushed outward toward his Master. Yoda blazed so strongly in the Force that it was startling that he hadn't sensed him before.

Just as he came to that realization, smiling and opening his eyes, the old Jedi's presence vanished. Luke made an involuntary sound of surprise and glanced around.

Deep in the undergrowth he heard a delighted cackle.

"Did it once you did, do it again you will. Find me, seek and find even children can play!"

Artoo's blat of amusement followed Luke as he darted after the sound of Yoda's voice…


End file.
